Tami’s Meandering Thoughts

I must admit, I am an awesome Yahtzee player. Tonight, while playing as a family, I earned 413 points. That’s right – 413! I filled the top with not just 3 of each number, but 4 of many. The entire bottom section was filled, and I rolled not just 1 but 2 “yahtzees”. The only place I put a “0” was for getting “1”’s in the top. Man, I am good. I challenge anyone to play me in Yahtzee.

I could end my story there. Perhaps some Yahtzee club would ask me to join. Maybe, if the right people hear about this, I would be covered in The Daily Star. I do look pretty good. However, honestly, that’s not the WHOLE story…

Last week, while playing with another couple, I got the lowest score of the 4 of us – not a single “yahtzee”, “4 of a kind” or “large straight”. Oh, and then on Saturday morning 2 six year olds and a nine year old beat me. Oops, perhaps not so amazing after all.

I wasn’t planning on writing anything today because I didn’t know how to explain my thoughts on what I read today without incriminating myself. But after the Yahtzee game where God gave me a great example, I just couldn’t let it go.

Jesus tells a story in Luke 18 about a tax collector and a Pharisee who both go to the Temple to pray. The Pharisee, gloating on his own goodness, thanks God for how awesome he is. The tax collector, on the other hand, doesn’t even feel himself worthy to lift his eyes to God. Instead, he “beat his chest in sorrow”, begging for God’s mercy and forgiveness. Jesus sums up the story with, “I tell you, this sinner, not the Pharisee, returned home justified before God. For those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted.”

The Pharisee examines his life, takes it upon himself to examine someone else’s life and comes up with the conclusion that, “Man, I am good”. And, in reality, he probably did keep all the commandments. But this is not the WHOLE story. Just looking at the outside, he looks great. But ask a few more questions, get a little deeper in his life, and you will find sin. If nothing else, then the sin of pride. Jesus didn’t tell this story just to pass the time on a hot day. Repeatedly in the Bible Jesus warns us of judging and comparing ourselves to others. I think He knows that we all struggle with this.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I pray hard to NOT be judgmental. I try NOT to judge someone else’s decisions – each person stands before God - they do not need to answer to me! I definitely do not consider myself any more righteous than anyone else – I know myself WAY too well to think I am any better than anyone else. However, we are all human.

You’ve been there. I am not even going to elaborate on situations – but I know you have, at times, looked at someone else’s decision and thought, “Why did they do that? I would never do that. Of course there were bad consequences – that was a stupid decision. I hope they ask God to forgive them for that!” Why do I know that you have done that? Because every human, including me, battles within themselves with how they stand in relation to other people. Am I smarter, more beautiful, skinnier, more hospitable, a better mother, a better wife…and on it goes.

So, today, as I admit that I have played bad “Yahtzee” games in the past, I pray that He will continue reminding me that before God I have nothing to boast about. Nothing but Jesus’ love for me.